“I don’t know if I want to stay married.”

If you’ve thought or actually said those words aloud — or painfully heard them from your spouse — you’re standing in one of the most difficult places a couple can be. One of you is leaning out of the marriage; the other is often desperate to save it. Traditional couples therapy assumes both partners want to work on the relationship, which is exactly why it so often fails “mixed-agenda” couples like these.

It sounds like such an easy thing to do. “Just listen.” Everyone thinks they are a good listener, but it is among the hardest things that couples do well. And it is also one of the most important skills to develop, as it is the basis for good communication — a necessary building block of a connected relationship. Discover what you need to do to become an Active Listener. You (and your partner!) will be glad you did.